Tsunami - The nature force

Forget about the latest gadget in town, forget about what's hot and what's not for fashion! The "rejected" feeling of not having one of the latest gadget, following the latest fashion trend is nothing compared to the massive destruction caused by mother nature. Thousands of lives were lost by the recent horrendus Tsunami.

What is Life? Have anyone wonder? Didnt i mention i'm going to post something about my thoughts on Life and Death, didnt know that a few days later, thousands of lives are being swept away just in a couple of hours.

*Why are we born?
*Who made our existence?
*What is the purpose in us living?
*What is life after Death? Is there any in the first place?
*Where will we be after we die? Dont tell me is either Heaven or Hell, because do u think it reallie exist ? If there is life after death, what happen to those Dinosaurs that once rule the earth, what happen to those animals that dies, wouldnt they be experiencing life after death too........

I dont wanna ask any more qns, the thought of it just me scared, just make me wanna tears, it is not death that is scary, it is the thought of leaving yr loved one behind, the things you love to do (be it sports or whatever passion you have), imagine leaving behind all yr fav CDs, electronic gadget, yr soft toys, etc..... Not knowing where the hell you would go, what life would be in the year 2100 or 2200 ...... we cant live that long to see the world, we cant do this , we cant do that, then where will we be in yr 2100 or 2200? The thought of dissapearing forever in the faces of earth just scares me, Then the qns of where are we here and where will we be after death always sent shiver down my spine...... Hundreds and Thousands of qns about life and death always ringing in my head, and i could only beg with mercy to my brain not to think about all these.

I dont mind seeing ghost, though we have been taught that they are the spirits that would do more harm than good to you. I heard stories of ppl being possess by evil spirits, how true would that be? Is it just a make-up stories or was it real cases, many a times we always scare ourselves out of nothing......... When we are young, how many kids dare to walk alone in the dark... Why are we just sooooo afraid to walk in the dark, is it because our parents or whoever always say there are ghost ard and some badies ard dark places. Our mind are just being tuned by our parents or our seniors that whenever we are alone in the dark, we will shiver in fear.

Going back to those stone ages days where human races dont even know how to speak, know nothing about electricity, they faces the dark once the night falls, and with onli moonlight to fall on if there ever need to see something...... Do u think they are worried of ghosts?

People always say we'll become ghost after we die, or whatever kind of things based on the stories you heard since young..... i dont mind seeing a ghost because if there is such things as ghost or ppl possess by spirits, then prolly i would be contented because i would know that i would still live after i die, there is still life after death tt is. I know i got weird thinking, but that is me, cause the thought of dissapearing completely and leaving behind yr loved ones and yr beloved stuffs just scared the shit out of me........

Ok, enough of my it, i dont wanna think anymore..........

The recent Tsunami attack just reinforce that statement or , "Life is fragile" , "Life is just like a Candle"
Buildings and roads that takes years to build, Families that takes decades to build up are just literally wash away by that massive Tsuanmi within hours. One might think that some part of those villagers might blame the god for taking aways the lives of the beloved kins, they would probably blame the "sea god" or whatever god they might think of or being mention by their ancestors............... whatever the case, shant argue whether is it god's will or just the cause of that destructive earthquakes

Let's have a moment of silent for those that had perish in that terrible Tsunami

Anyway i'll be away for two days, just in time for the 2005 countdown, it's the time where most would be scared to travel by the sea, but for me, i'm just going against the odds by travelling using ship route.

Just hope that i will have a safe trip. =)

Happy advance 2005 to all my friends!

Merry X'mas Everyone! Urm... though it's kinda late, however there a saying "Better Late than Never"

Well was quite busy for the past few days, didnt reallie have the time to sit down in front of the comp to blog, was busy driving my relatives ard this christmas and not forgeting spending precious time with my dearie!

It was a special christmas this year, no happening stuffs, just me and her... and i think sometimes it is better to leave the whole world for a while to be with yr loved one. That's exactly what i did.

Christmas Eve
Didnt do much, just me and dearie out shopping, places were flooded with people! gosh! i hate crowds! yea i reallie hate it! I just cant walk, shop with peace, and with tt sickening feeling of squeezing through the crowds! oh gosh! yucks, pukes!

Got a christmas gift from dearie...... it's a wallet !!! Sweet! Real nice...... The way she wrap the gift, ohh..... nice wrapper, nice wrapping skills, the best thing is the gift itself! Branded Wallet, bet it cost her quite a fair bit, She bought me something that i would have to think thrice or countless time before buying. And to think that she dont mind parting away her precious money to get me something sooo expensive when she's not even working! Gosh, dont want her to go into financial crisis bcos of this gift, but it's happening soon anyway.......

*looking at my precious wallet now! Sweet! =)

Got her a pressie too, she badly need a watch and i guess it's the perfect christmas pressie for her! =) It's the latest design, and it's not even official launch yet till Feb 05 and currently there's only 1 piece of tt design at 2 outlet in Singapore and since i get 1 for her that would mean there's left onli one in the whole wide singapore, which also means either 1 more person or none will have exactly the same watch as her till the official launch date! ok at least tt wat the salesgirl say. Nonetheless such a special girl she is definately deserve a special gift that i'm giving her. Merry X'mas dearie! =)


Christmas Day
The moment the clock struck twelve! Ho ho ho! Dearie just beside me! Tt's nice! keke~ It's always great feeling when your loved one just beside you on this joyous occasion. =) grinz
Was out with my relatives that's from overseas, since they came all the way here, it onli make sense for me to bring them ard, and dearie was there tagging along too....... it's just feel nice having her accompanying me.

Boxing Day
Was out shopping with my relatives again, and this time it was an improptu decision that dearie was out with me again. hahahah~ Guess she cant even not see me for one day! hahahah.... i'm just kidding! =P

My sis is off to Batam enjoying herself with my relatives! Well I'll be joining her soon when i settle my stuffs, and then will head back to Singapore for the YR 2005 Countdown!!! =)

6 more days to year 2005!!!
Very very fast it's gonna be the end of yr 2004, i can still remember soooo clearly about saying out loud my yr 2004 resolution on 1 jan 2004..... oh well... times reallie flies, and now i gonna have my 2005 resolution ready to be said!

I hope i will have a wonderful year ahead! as Yr 2005 is my year!! cos it's the chickie chickie year! hahahaha....

Just in case i dont blog tt often......... to all my friends, Best wishes for Yr 2005!!! Cheers!

Ho Ho Ho ...... Santas Clause is Coming to town......

Just 2 more days before Christmas...... Been walking ard lately and saw sooo many shops putting up e "On Sale" signboard...... argh! no money man! if not i will be one of the many enjoying myself with discount products. =P

Still got no plans for Christmas! hahahah... dunno where to go, dunno wat to do........... Well dont have a habit of celebrating Christmas though.

Meeting Dearie later to watch the "Kung Fu' Movie, i believe i will have a good time laughing away while watching that show, Stephen Chow never fail to make me laugh in his show. =) *grinz

Office is having Christmas celebration later during lunch time, i got my pressie ready, no fanciful pressie, just cheap cheap one, hehe.....

* I want lots of pressie for my Christmas!!! =p

Hi Guys. i'm back ! I better be back before you guys get sick and tired of reading the same entry for days! =) and of cos before spiders start crawling all over my bloggie site. =p

Nothing much happen during the past few days, been busy with one stuffs a couple of days ago, and that is to get my Final Year Project done!~ Finally complete it on 18 dec! Phew~ Hopefully nothing go wrong and i will graduate with a Degree!! Complete a hons degree at the age of 23, and considering i'm a guy that gone tru national service... hmmm.... not a bad achievement... hahaha.... *peace
Going to be Harry Potter as plan next year nov, when i recieve tt piece of paper, many regards as a Degree cert, and without it, many companies would just slam their door hard on yr face. Ouch! tt's the cruelity in life!

Spend the past few days chilling out with dear..... yeah.... i think abit no life ... just me and her... however i just like it this way... and she doesnt seems to mind a single bit. Went carrefour tt day with my parents, she can just click with my family just like tt...... I dont think i can click with ppl the way she does it. =)

Christmas is coming..... *kelv sing........ Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle all the way................ Joy to the world, the lord has come....... Last christmas i give you my heart, the very next day you give it away, this year to save me from tears, i give it to someone special.......................

okok...... enuff of singing.... Christmas is coming, and yet i dont know wat to do... oh well.. normally i dont have a habit of celebrating christmas.... it's just in me. Nonetheless gonna spend it with someone special this year...... with or without doing anything , it doesnt matter ... as long as i'm with her..... everything, anything is fine.......

*smile =)

Dearie is coming back today! wooohoooo..... ; )

Two more days before my project submission, and i still havent finish yet..... kan cheong spider liaoz.... just ask for extension and couldnt get it.....ohh no.... hiaz....... just have to try and finish it....shall hope for the best..... i believe i can do it

"Just Do It" yeah.... hahahahah

Ytd was my cousin big day..... was busy sending my relatives here and there..... been reflecting alot ytd, seeing alot of my cousin that are younger than me growing up..... and its kinda scary.... cos this means i'm growing old..... hiaz... well tt's life isnt it. I still can remember when i was 8years old, i wish i didnt have to grow any older.... I dont like the idea of growing old and then die..... So much thought went tru my young mind then and it is still pretty much the same now. Gosh! time reallie flies! Shant be too melancholic..... will put some thoughts on life and death next time... for now i need to spend more time on my project rather than my blog! hahahah....

oh well.... just too happy that dearie is coming back.....
She's coming back, she's coming back, she's coming back, she's coming back, she's coming back............ did i mention that she's coming back... oh yes.... dearie coming home, she is coming back!

=) *big grinz

It's tuesday !!! two more days, dearie will be back! wooohoo... okok... cool it kelvin cool it... you are crazy..... yes i am, I miss her like crazy =)

It is also 4 more days before my project dateline!!! argh! die! Kinda half way tru... havent been reallie going full force in completing it, i guess i always reward myself for the effort i put in my project. Sometimes over rewarding! heehee~ Basically it is like work for 2 to 3 hour straight, then i will play game, relax, listen music... do watever stuffs other than project for more than same amount of time i put in my project... guilty guilty =P

So far this week has been good, missing her wasnt as bad as i first thought cause we thought we not going to talk for the longest time, luckily thanks to the greatest invention on earth, that invention we call cellphone, or handphone as we commonly know. Dont know whether Hp bills gonna shoot up or not. Well.... its doesnt reallie matter as long as i know she is doing fine over there, and she'll be returning like in two days time! =)
I'm happy because i can save on overseas call and secondly i can see her... well the latter will be the more exact reason though =)

Tml is my cousin big day, yes it is his wedding!!! Wish him blissful marriage. =)
This also means that its gonna be a busy day for me as well, as i have to chauffer my relatives ard..... FOC chauffer leh.... wah piangz..... oh well it's a joyous occasion so it doesnt reallie matter =)
Time reallie flies, still can vivdly remember the days where i use to play with my cousin, and tml he is gonna get married (as in chinese customary), and prob few years down the road he will become a father. Without me carefully thinking, i'm gonna reach mid twenties pretty soon... oh gosh..... that's super fast! The way time flies reallie scare me...... Responsibility always comes together with age. The older you are, the more responsibility you would be expected to shoulder...... gosh ... i havent have enough fun yet... oh well who would say they have had enough fun. I miss the good old carefree days where i dont even need to care about money, work, blah blah blah.....
It is way much better to be a child. Sometimes with the amount of stress, pressure, responsibility you have, you just feel like hey! i need to take a break and catch my breath! phew!

Well.... that's the cruel fact of life b'cos time and tide wait for no man! Now i just have to look forward and miss all those good old days =)
Hope year 2005 would be a wonderful year for me!!!

Ok gonna catch the last episode of "My mighty in-laws" It's gonna be real exciting!!! After that shall head back to my project.....

*counting down the no. of days..... it's just another 2 more days....... =)

It's Sunday!!! Times reallie fast.... we approaching to the end of yr 2004 pretty soon..... Alot of things happen this year... Ups and down but i thank god cos i believe i gonna have a good closing end for my 2004 yr. =)

Those that know me and quite close to me will know exactly what happen to me during my low key period this year..... I thank those who stood by me during that period of time.... and i'm soo happy that i have found somebody special that would stand by me forever.....

She may not be the prettiet woman i ever know.... She may not be good in alot of things but to me she is someone special....
*She is sweet, real sweet
*She show me the meaning of love that i use to find it sooo difficult to trust just months ago

LOVE is a strong word.... and i dont say LOVE to anyone.... I have my own sets of LOVE value, i have my own defination of LOVE, LOVE is a word i would use it sacredly.... I onli say it to two woman in my life b4... however she gonna be the third woman that i will gonna say it. I believe she deserve every single alphabet of LOVE... she deserve every single meaning of this word LOVE from me.

Dear, you know how much u mean to me... This song is for you.....

Say'n I LOVE YOU - Moffats

Saying I love you, it's the hardest thing to do
and if I ever do, girl I'll always be true
I may not be the best
Looking guy you ever knew
But I can show you love
That will always be true
And when your skies turn grey
My love will guide the way
And if these words that I hold
Could only be told

Saying I love you, it's the hardest thing to do
and if I ever do, girl I'll always be true

And when your tears fall to the ground
I will pick you up when you're feeling down

Saying I love you, it's the hardest thing to do
and if I ever do, girl I'll always be true

And when your tears fall to the ground
I will pick you up when you're feeling down

Saying I love you, it's the hardest thing to do
and if I ever do, girl I'll always be true

_____________________________________________________________________________________


She is out of town, going genting for holiday... i wish that she will enjoy herself..... =)

I just left a week before i have to submit my project up... this coming week gonna be very busy ... with wed gonna be big day for my cousin cos it gonna be his wedding!!! Shall not spend sooo much time on my blog lioaz... gonna head back to my project.... I need time... plenty of time.....

*Off to my project now....
*I MISS HER =)

My dad got his cab on the day same as dear dear bday.... that's to me is soooo conincident yeah... =) Well so far it has been good for daddy so far.... i wish him good business =)

Was out with dear celebrating her bday ..... think i didnt reallie do a great job.... alot of impromptu decision, nonetheless hope she enjoyed herself =) Well just love the times we share together...... it is just plain sweet!

I got myself a brand new nike slipper! hahaha.... did i mention before i onli wear nike slipper.... oh well i'm just abit nike craze.... well dont care lah.... i "Just Do It" hahahaha

I havent start on my project yet... argh! simply no mood... i will start tonight... yap.. definately tonight! I have to submit the project if not i cant complete my degree course and it would mean i wasted two years studying for tt stupid paper call Degree in accounting and finance. Sometimes i wonder do i reallie need to go tru shit and money to get that piece of paper... afterall it is seriously a peice of paper..... oh well... shouldnt complain so much since i'm very very close to the finishing line..... Gambatte yo!!!

well been out with dear every single day from the day we got together... i dont know whether it is good or bad.... but i just miss spending time with her but at the same time i got my own stuffs to juggle.... guess it is what we always say, we need time management and setting priorities yeah.... hahaha

Well it;s gonna rain soon now... dark clouds over the sky... well just hope that it dont rain while i'm coaching later.....

Christmas approaching... and i dont have enough money to spend during this holiday.... argh.. financial crisis for me...... bleahz.... nonetheless hope i can see money fall from the sky soon......

*staring at the sky now...........

My daddy and sis are back !!! I'm free from the responsiblity that i was shouldering for the past few days! Phew!

Yup as my sixth sense predicted correctly, i got my pressie from dad.... nice nice.... =)

Today is dear's birthday............. Happy birthday dear! =)

My dad is going to collect his taxi today !!! oh wat a day yeah.... 0812... This number sure is special...... quick must buy 4D ... muahahhahhaha

Ok is lunch time.... i'm hungry..... Food........ i'm coming for you!!!!........... yum yum yum yum...

It been 3 days since i last blog anything.... well... apologies for that... i have been a filial son all these while. Has been helping my dad with his business while he is enjoying himself over at Thailand with my sis.... Talk about fairness yeah.... hahahahahahaha

Well since the day i finish my exam till now ... i havent even touch my project yet... ohh guilty guilty but at least i manage to borrow some books to start on my project.

These few days have been kinda a routine for me... wake up 6 plus in the morning go work (as in my dad business) then do this do that as he has ask me to do.... blah blah blah.... And at the end of the day i will sleep like around 2am in the morning... so which means i onli been getting 4hrs of sleep for the pass three days.... i wanna faint soon... my eyes kinda puffy now... Dont know whether i look like puffy fish or not... wwaaahhahaha....

And for the past few days i have been meeting dear too.... ohh... dont know wat going to happen if we dont meet each other for few days... well.. guess it will happen pretty soon cause i dont have sooo much luxury of a time to spare and neither has her too.... =p

She is a sweet lovely lady.... did anyone know that she spend soooo much time and effort on creating, decorating, fixing a blogsite just for the both of us..... omg! Tell me if she sweet or not.....=)

And it was just 2 days ago that she told me i am rank no.1 in her life! Am i really that good to be somebody no. 1 in their life? oh well..... to her i am... and i am real honoured. =)

It's tuesday today and tml would be dearie bday!!! and i havent got her a present yet.... gosh! any idea anyone???? (Within my budget pls ah...) =p

Tonight is the night my dad and sis are coming back!!!! Hoooray!!!!! I can sense they gonna bring back alot of present for me.... My sixth sense normally dont fail me! hahahahaha....

*prezzie prezzie........ =) BIG BIG GRINZ ... hehe~

EXAM OVER!!!! Hoooray!!!! It feel sooo good... yeah... so damm good! Was in happy mode for the past two days or so.... Just wanna relak my mind, my brain after working so 'hard' for my exam. I think i've no more brain juice left lioaz..... =p

Thursday paper was good, at least i know how to do..... however i got soo many info to write, i dont know how to arrange it in nicely order....hahah... and in the end..... dont reallie have time to finish it properly.... i guess i always write grandfather story.... hiaz... well.. dont think soo much... at least it is definately better than the tuesday paper.... and i can rightly annouce i gonna graduate from my degree soon ............ wooooooohhhhhaaaaaaa........

I nearly scream! when the invigilator say "ok, times up, stop writing"..... i'm not trying to scream or shout at him, but the fact is that my exams are over... yeah it is all over... finally over.... my last degree exam paper is over!!!

I feel like celebrating until i realise hey...i still have a project need to be submitted on this month 18 before i can duly say i have complete my degree course (of course that is that i got no supp paper or watsoever) I was like... alamak! But hack it... gonna play first.... i still left a jolly 14 days to work on my project.... at least it is a project .... i also believe project is easier than exam.... urm.... i hope this belief still hold on... ok at least till i submit my project on the 18. =p

Went out with Jo after my exam.... she was late and yet she still dare to come out with the joanne rule of punctuality... omg... can faints ................ Went to catch the show ... "without a paddle" quite a nice show.. was laffing alot in the movie... The show was nice, but the things that happen in the show was even nicer....... *shant say what actually happen in the show... *grinz
muaaaahahahahahahahahahah

After the show, was walking aimlessly again.... we always do tt, however we kinda enjoy it... ok probably we just enjoying each other company and not the walking aimlessly part... cause after walking sooo long, my leg and back hurts ....

Friday, sent my sis and dad off to Thailand... Sawadee-kup .......... my sis is having competition over there... how i hope i can join her.... i mean i just wanna go overseas.... =) however i cant.. cos i have to help my dad on his business since he's following sis over ... They better buy something good for me when they come back..... hahahahah... just kidding...=p

Alright its time to sleep! Need to catch some rest.... very very tired..... to that someone special that has enter my life... i miss you....... *poof*

Hasnt been a great day today! So damm bloody weird... Woke up today and manage to catch the bus to go to exam venue... wasted 10mins to try to clarify with them to get my seats... why cant they have a proper allocation, soo many miscommunication, idiots man! It's already 10.10am on the clock, take a look at my exam qns... feel like walking out immediately, this is madness.... spend close to half an hour to decide which qns should i attempt, and in the end onli manage to complete 2 out of 3qns.. SHIT! Was quite tired after the exam cos i studied till quite late the day before... tout i can go home and sleep but was ask to do some stuffs.... argh.. didnt rest and of i go for coaching... miss my bus the moment i reach there.... waited and waited and it seems like ages and the bus still insist on not coming, well took another bus instead and then try to change bus later at the other bus stop, and not long after i alight at the bus-stop, the bus i suppose to take came, wah piangz... why cant the bus just come 2mins earlier just now.... Because of waiting for tt stupid bus i was late for coaching.... Then when i finish coaching was about to leave tt time, it rain! Gosh.... wait until the rain stop and then proceed to the bus stop to take bus and go home, and when i ran towards the bus stop the moment i saw the bus, the bloody female bus driver just dont wanna stop for me, and in the end i have to wait soo damm long again for the bus to come! Idiots! Everything didnt seem to go smoothly for me today especially the EXAM TODAY!!! argh!! I wonder did i offended anybody and being cast a spell or wat! Argh! Hope tml will be a better day! Hopefully my thur would not be the same as today! Thursday gonna be the last day of my exam! Hope whatever i study will come out!
*Pray Hard!!!

Anyway Thanks Jo for being sooo sweet, thanks for that lovely sms, you did make me smile! Thanks

Alright time to head back to my notes! Last paper! Hang on there!!!!

*Studying Mode

So fast its the last day of the month November. This also means that i'm going to have 1 more exam before becoming a free man. Oh well it was just last week that the thought of having exam would sent cold vibe to my skin, and now i'm going to finish my exam pretty soon. Times reallie flies!

Today paper just sucks! and i reallie mean suck big time!!!! Argh! Frustration, agony, whatever negative aspect of feeling will be associated with me right after i finish my paper, or in fact while sitting for the paper. Up to this point in time i am still FRUSTRATED, ANGRY, FURIOUS, MAD!!!!

I just couldnt do a bloody single qns! Yes not even a SINGLE Qns !!! This is the worst paper i ever take in my whole student life! It was drastic contrast to all the papers that i have took previous week. I have confidence abt the result or the marks i going to get for all my previous paper. Nothing of this sort can be said to this paper, probably the outcome that i'm most confident of is that i'm going to FAIL, and i mean FAIL BIG TIME!!! ARGH!!!
I'm absolutely gutted! The papers is upon 300 marks (3qns 100 marks each) and i only manage to do 2 qns, and u guys know that i dont even know to ans any one of the qns. I do it for the sake of doing it! I reallie wish i didnt have to sit for this paper!!! I feel like walking out of the exam venue, but the saddest truth is i'm already there... leave and i would get 0 marks, so i decided to give it a shot even though i aint know shit abt any of the qns!!! To make matter worse, it is all calculation based qns... it is either u know or u dont know, there is nothing in between, it is not like those kind of marketing or management paper where u can bluff yr way through and hope for the best that kind! Oh well.... i'm dead! i'm in deep shit! would reallie have to pray very hard in order to get at least a 25%.... yup u get me right... that would mean 75marks upon 300marks! Gosh! That's the minimum criteria i have to obtain before any thoughts of having an honours degree and i havent even consider other factors yet!!! gosh ! This paper is terrible... i should have just take it last semester. Even if i took it while i was sick i think i could still gather a score higher than what i'm goin to get today. It's not that i'm pessimistic or what, it is just the cruel fact of the bloody truth! I aint know how to do a single qns!!!! I aint know shit man!!!! Ok the problem is not because i didnt study, if i didnt study then it is fair enough, but the blooy problem is that the topics that is being tested is not being covered with me last semester!!! I bet they did some correction over what topic is going to be tested and what is not for this subject for the current batch of student and not me!!! And i'm the bloody kuku from my own batch (previous batch) sitting for that bloody exam paper! Tell me abt it! I know nuts what is going on for the current batch of student! and to be tested on the topic that they study and not mine! This is ridiculous! Oh gosh! can somebody pls save me! I need the marks! i badly need the marks! I do not want the result for this paper to spoil all my previous good mark i obtain , the effort i put in for all my previous papers! I do not want at the end of the day i didnt meet the first criteria for a honours degree because of this bloody stupid idiotic reason! I'm going mad!! Real mad! and to think that i still have one more paper to go! I just have no mood to carry on and to add salt to my wound, the next paper for me is also last semester paper, and i beginning to wonder whether will it be the same topics that i did covered to be tested in this coming paper! I'm going crazy! This is madness! .... MADNESS !!!

安靜 - 周杰倫 ( An Jing - Jay Chou )

I love this song soo much.... The lyrics is sooo meaningful.....and it says exactly what i was feeling the other time..... oh god! why am i feeling nostalgic again...... argh.....

安靜 - 周杰倫

只剩下鋼琴陪我談了一天
睡著的大提琴
安靜的舊舊的
我想你已表現的非常明白
我懂我也知道
你沒有捨不得
你說你也會難過我不相信
牽著你陪著 我也只是曾經
希望他是真的比我還要愛你
我才會逼自己離開

Chorus

你要我說多難堪
我根本不想分開
為什麼還要我用微笑來帶過
我沒有這種天份
包容你也接受他
不用擔心的太多
我會一直好好過
你已經遠遠離開
我也會慢慢走開
為什麼我連分開都遷就著你
我真的沒有天份
安靜的沒這麼快
我會學著放棄你
是因為我太愛你
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

An Jing - Jay Chou

Only the piano accompanies me throughout the day
The sleeping cello
Quiet and so old
I think you've made yourself clear
I know and I'm sure
You don't regret
You say you're upset too, that I don't believe
You being with me was in the past
I hope he loves you more than I do
Only then will I bring myself to leave

Chorus

You want me to say it, but it is awkward
I don't even want to break up
Why must I depend on a smile to tide me through?
I don't have the ability
To accept both you and him
Don't worry too much
I'll still be fine
You've already gone far away
And I will slowly walk away
Why is it that I have to accommodate you even when [we] break up?
I really don't have the ability
Staying silent doesn't come so fast
I will learn to give you up
Because I love you so much

I'm one big culprit of not studying... just aint no mood.... my friends are all celebrating the completion of their degree where i'm left to complete another 2 more papers! Argh! Oh well Exam coming on Tue... and i have to do something abt it... i have oredi wasted two days as i didnt even touch my notes. I needed somebody to kick my ass and scream my head off a little.... oh well.. nvm...i shall find some self-motivational factors!

Today is Sunday, and it's a perfect day to study.... *yah damm right! oh well..... i going to have my whole day preparing for my exam..... I shall look forward to the day 2 Dec where i will duly complete all my exam ! Yeah! But in the meantime i gonna slog like an idiotic person..... and i dont like this kind of feeling....

Ytd was Jay concert.... heard from Jo is a super duper concert... and i'm jealous.... hahaha.... oh well... some of his songs are real nice and the meaning for certain songs are really very meaningful... okie, shant elaborate what kind of connection between me and his few certain songs.... just dont wanna feel nostalgic yeah.......

I'm going to head back to my notes.... i needed to... i being force to... cos i dont have a choice and i dont have much time left either.........

*Switch to Studying mode!

Today was my second paper and i couldnt finish in time! argh! Oh well Second paper for me but for my classmate it was their last ! Argh! After the paper, there was like soo much noise... noise of celebration... I'm jealous! freaking jealous!!!
Tml still got paper! argh! gonna head back to my notes soon... just no mood to study ... sianz....

Just finish watching "ye man qing jia" (My Mighty in-law) on channel 8. What a funny show!!! I getting hook on that show! Vincent Ng was super funnie in that show.... Almost all the character in the show are damm funnie too.... Two thumbs up man!!!

Well today episode is abt Rui-en and Vincent... hmm.... the way Rui-en tell Vincent on the things she like abt him.. oh my god.... thats like sound sooo damm familiar ! hahahahah
Well it was reallie sweet of her! i mean bascially when u like someone... u reallie like almost every single thing abt tt person lor... basically there is no reason why u like him/her but you know abt what/which things u like abt him/her and if u list it down, it gonna reflect almost pratically everything about him/her. =) grinz
Well just now tt part was reallly kinda bring back memories ... hiaz... sometimes it is just sooo hard to find someone u like and tt someone like u in return too..... =p

okok... shall stop feeling nostalgic and head back to my notes.... i'm soo worried that ppl might mistaken that i'm in a relationship with my notes now since i'm soo damm close with it.... its always me and my notes..... i'm freaking out soon....

Somebody saves me...................

*i'm uttering rubbish ... pardon me pls..... *poof*

Finally i decided to upload one of my all time fav song...... This is also a song where my nick came from..... "selfestem" .... I'm in a punk-rock mood now..... so here Selfesteem by offspring .. take it away.... =)


*Kelv sing... ahhemm.... la la lala la la la la lala.....

Selfesteem - Offspring

I wrote her off for the tenth time today
And practiced all the things I would say
But she came over
I lost my nerve
I took her back and made her dessert

Now I know I'm being used
That's ok because I like the abuse
I know she's playing with me
That's okay cause I've got no self-esteem

We make plans to go out at night
I wait till 2 then I turn out the light
All this rejection's got me so low
If she keeps it up I just might tell her so

When she's saying that she wants only me
Then I wonder why she sleeps with my friends
When she's saying that I'm like a disease
Then I wonder how much more I can spend
Well I guess I should stick up for myself
But I really think it's better this way
The more you suffer
The more it shows you really care, Right?

Now I'll relate this a little bit
That happens more than I'd like to admit
Late at night she knocks on my door
Drunk again and looking to score
Now I know I should say no
But that's kind of hard when she's ready to go
I may be dumb
But I'm not a dweeb
I'm just a sucker with no self-esteem

Recieved a letter from the Navy asking me to go back for a seminar in full uniform! Argh! It's coming.... i can sense it coming..... my reservist... my national service liability ....argh! Well wat a waste of time! A full day listening to all those craps that i couldnt find at least a bit interesting! I bet they are preparing me for all those reservist shit! Leave me alone man... Not that i'm dont love the country or what, but i just think it's gonna take away the fun of being a common people (civilians) and i think i could have use the time to do something better, more meaningful things. And to think that i receive this piece of news just in the midst of my exam.... i wonder whether do they really have to give me their very own "morale boosting" treatment in such a timely fashion.

My dad just call me and told me he pass his taxi vocational license! Holy! Congrates Dad! You deserve it! He sounded sooo estatic over the phone that if there is a $100 dollar note lying on the floor, he'll probably miss it......
I bet he is beaming with joy now! He reallie deserve it for i witness the amount of effort he put in before the exam..... The way he studied and prepared for his exam makes me feel so guily over the way i'm currently preparing for my exam now! *ouch!
You can see the amount of desire he wants to get hold of that piece of license from the look of his eyes, the way he behaves..... If u staying under the same roof with him, i can gurantee you can feel it the same way as i do. Now that he passed the exam and getting the license soon, he deserve every single bit of that small piece of card that got the word "Taxi vocational license and his name on it."

Congrates to you, Dad! I love you!

Back to my own life, hahaha.. nothing much..... same shit, different day! Kinda half way tru my revision for my tml paper... pray hard that watever i've tried to study and memorise would come out in tml paper..... =)

I'm heading nowhere now except back to my notes ..... *poof*

Done with my First paper! Phew ! One down and 4 more to go... sweat sweat ....
Should have do better for my first paper... hiaz ... wasted man... I need to Hit 75 marks but i guess i could onli gather a marks that is close to that... booooo man.....

Oh well was down coaching and end up swam quite a bit.... feeling abit tired... and since i onli gathered 5hrs of sleep today, i guess it didnt reallie help ah... okie... i think i need to head back to my notes..... bed? notes? bed? notes? .... ok both i think


*poof*

Another piece of nonsense to destress me... oh well... This kind of survey or quiz or watever names u have for it, their main purpose is to destress a person yeah... so the answer or the result for it are sometimes true, sometimes it is somewhat true, sometimes it is not so true, sometimes it is not very true, sometimes it is not true, sometimes it is totally untrue

Hahahaha.... you are the judge to whether if it is the truth......

so many words of "true" ........... *faints

You Are From Mercury

You are talkative, clever, and knowledgeable - and it shows. You probably never leave home without your cell phone! You're witty, expressive, and aware of everything going on around you. You love learning, playing, and taking in all of what life has to offer. Be careful not to talk your friends' ears off, and temper your need to know everything.

What Planet Are You From?

It's Monday!!! holy sh*t! Tml the start of my first degree exam... -_-"
*Praying hard

Oh well still got time to do this boh lioaz survey ... ok... take it away

You Are the Loyalist

6 You have strong relationships and are intensely loyal. People find you easy to love and care for. You like your world to be stable and secure, no surprises. You're cautious. You prefer your inner circle to the outside world.

What number are you?

I made jo angry a long while ago... oh well wasnt mean to... anyway clear up the air oredi... she noe my intention wasnt to attitude her but something else... guess i get it all so wrong yea....
I hope i'm to her is not an attitude boi ... but a good attitude boi =) *big grinz

I get soo bothered over the fact till i couldnt reallie study... i mean i didnt mean something i didnt mean it.... ok wat am i saying.... i didnt meant to attitude her... and u know if somebody wrong u .. u wldnt feel alright rite... so that's exactly what i'm feeling.... Oh well.... i wouldnt give a damm if tt somebody doesnt mean anything to me lor.... okie... enuff said.

Ok shall head back to my notes.... i need to be good boi remember... hahhaha.... =)

Today is already Friday, just 4 days before the start of my Exam!! Yesh 4 days!! argh!! how fast is that! Gosh! I'm still slowly cultivating to be a hardworking student.... i still cant get into the mood of studying, prolly i'm somehow distracted over certain things.... oh well i'm gonna keep my focus.... =)
i did it once a few months before when things happen, i will do it again... no doubts abt that! =)

Nothing much happen today, just me and my notes and of cos my beloved bed *grinz =) oh well enough of destressing in my blog... gonna head back to my 'lovely' notes....

*Gambatte yo!!!!! Study Study Study!!! =)

Was out with Jo ytd, basically just shop and shop and shop...... Didnt really have an agenda but just wanna get some fresh air... and she was a great gal to hang out with except those poking, pinching, punching, all those P's u can think of =p

Treat her one thai ice tea and guess wat, i drop my very own ice tea and it spill over my berms... oh.. how clumsy can i get... Well my berms and slippers get jealous over the fact tt i treat Jo ice tea i guess, so much so they want a share of my ice tea... argh!

Woke up this morning with blue black on my arms... i guess no need me to say... u guys shld know who the culprit is ah.....

Read a few notes... but still not studying enuff i guess.... i will head back to my notes once i finish Sg idol....

I will study! I doesnt have much choice yea..... =p

Feel so good after a much needed rest. =) It been a long time since i last slept sooo long! ohh... feel so shiok!

My parents are finally back from their holiday! Feel so relieve to see them back.... I miss them! =)

Ytd went out with Jo, before reaching her house, there was quite a big downpour, guess heaven want me to drive carefully and safely ah... ok .. which i did. During the journey, i took out my phone to let her see at her request... ohh bad move, once she got her hand on my phone tt's it... she keep snapping away... i was sooo afraid that my camera lens will just crack lor! =p Reach the destination, the place was bloody crowded... okok.. i mean the carpark is bloody crowded... i have to queue up to enter into the carpark lor.... sometimes i just hate to drive... cos where to park your car can reallie give u a big big headache.....

Watch the show, The forgotton, hmm.. not a bad show. It will keep you suspend on yr seats till the very last moment of the show. The story line was not bad but i think it's kinda dumb and the ending abit too abrupt.... they make the alien soooo powerful.. in that case, they can anytime rule our world wat.... why in the first place waste their time in doing some nonsense experience... oh well... there are a few shudden shock in the show, one of it is the part where a car just suddendly bang into the main actor/actress car....okok...about the movie, i shall be generous, shall give it 3 out of 5 popcorns.

I notice something abt Jo, went ard shopping a little with her... she will just pick up any white or pink stuffs... hahahah... say her a little, i will get poke, slapp on my stomach and shoulders.... Talking abt violent gal... she is definately one .. =p

Right now checking all my bruises and injuries from ytd ... *check check check

Going to have my lunchee now and head back to my notes... i have been in holiday mood for the past 2days, havent touch my notes and feeling so guilty now.... okok....... Notes... i'm coming for you now.....

Selemat Hari Raya!!!

My parents and sis are enjoying themselves over at Batam island, leaving me alone to face the four wall of our house. Oh well, I wasnt feeling too comfortable about being left alone (reason being mention earlier or those who know me will know the reason) before they left, hmm.. how wrong ah... i'm now pretty comfortable... so shiok to have the whole house to myself!!! Great! =) I think i'm real fine!!!

The good thing about having the whole house to myself is that basically i can do whatever i want... blast the music.... sing out loud... do watever nonsense i wanna do.. hahaha.... of cos i do have some control over myself and not becoming some wild animal being let loose tt kind.
The bad thing is ... i need to source for food.... ok eating outside will solve the problem, but i cant do it if let say my family are away for a week or so, with my huge appetite it gonna drain me financially, guess it shld be time to pick up some cookery skills yea...

Was out coaching ytd... was parking my car at my coaching venue then i realise that there is an event going on... took a closer look then i realise it is the event that i was suppose to attend ... i was suppose to watch princess and wx performance... i cant make it bcos i need to fetch my sis from the competition venue and then send my family off for their holiday... yea.. "their" holiday... =p Oh well didnt know it was soo near my coaching place... basically just across a small road that's all... hahaha.. how coincident rite! Haiz... it was sooo near yet sooo far lor.... didnt manage to meet her anyway. =(

I was very surprise to see princess name appearing when my phone ring.... totally didnt expect it... talking abt making my day... she sure did. Though it just a super short conversation at least i know she's doing fine that kind. It been a long time since i last hear her voice and to know that she was having sore throat for close to a week doesnt help too yea... it was a relief to hear her voice.. at least she still sounded ok.. but she do sounded real tired after her performance... guess she was feeling exhausted and her sickness just make her feel even worse.
Take care princess~ =)

Sleep at 2am again and woke up early in the morning... manage to collect notes from adel, been copying and reading some of the notes.... suddendly i find myself soooo studious like tt... hahaha.... oh well....the exam dates are too near to be true, so i gotto start somehow , somewhere....

Prolly gonna catch a movie later..... I need to go out and get some fresh air and of cos at the same time fill up my stomache....

* Food Food where r u ........................... ???

*yawns.... oh well... wat a way to start blogging yeah. =p
Been sleeping late recently, it is so ever often nowadays that i couldnt remember when was the last time i sleep before 2am in the morning. The worst part is i always wake up ard the same time, so which means if i keep sleeping later and later, i would not have enuff rest....i'm accumulating tiredness... oh well.. tt's my own bloody problem right..... *yawns .. feel so tired now.

Later in the afternoon, my lovely sis gonna have her swim competition, after tt she and my parents will be out of town.......... well i'm left alone again..... i need a breather.. i need a holiday... my notes is killing me... okok.. havent been studying, but the thought of reading my notes is killing me, and i just come to realise that i'm in deep shit now as there is not much time left for my revision. Argh!!! frustration !!

I wanna go out have fun, but the notes is pulling me back! I got the luxury of having the whole house to myself, however i think i gonna bore myself down this time round!!! Last time whenever i got the whole house to myself, i would go yea ! cos my gf then would come over and stay and we will be like having our small little house living in our small little world... oh well.. it just bring back memories yea.... thought it was a small steps for our future living togetherness, and we did have a rollin good time, however things happen and things change... and this time round i gonna have to face the four walls all by myself !!!

Enuff of this past nonsense craps... dont wanna get drain thinking abt all those past.... I need my brain space for some other more useful purpose.... i need extra compartment for my notes... argh!!! Notes, exams!!! it killing me!!!

Ok... i think i'm feeling better now.... it's nice to vent my frustration on something... and venting on my blog means good at least i wont go ard venting it on my friends or those ppl that are close to me.

Gotto head back to my notes again..... if i have a punching bag at home.... i feel like punching it now... i need to sweat out all my frustration, i want to scream.... oh shit! what happen to me today...... i'm feeling sooo soooo soo damm frustrated at the moment... it's been a long time since i last feel this way.... it is soooo sudden.. i guess i having PMS.... i wanna scream !!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....................................

Happy Deepavali Everyone ........

Oh well tout i could make full use of today to study... how wrong was i, wake up in the morning and got a terrible headache... ouch! Took a short nap in the afternoon before proceed for my swimming coaching.

well luckily i'm feeling better now...... hope i got the mood and my brain is able to function well to study later...

Gonna have my dinner now before i start my slow revision again......


* Can somebody teach me how to have a super powerful memory!!! I need it for my revision!!!

Wake up early today, Head down to TP to join my guys for their morning jogging session..... ahahha.... i feel like a Poly student!!!! Old body with a young heart yeah... hahahahahahh

Oh well..... was great to see the team jelling so well .... i'm very happy.... finally i see team cohesiveness, team supportiveness....ok... in short -team work!- well i'm just plain happy that they are doing things as a team instead of individuals. =)

Having fun playing table-tennis... and i come to a conclusion that i really suck at it! lolx
I think my badminton skill is anytime better man... hahaha...

Oh well, have dinner with mel and jo... so paiseh... cos i didnt know where to eat.... ayiah me hor this person... no preference for food one... as long as got place to eat then i can eat there liaoz... i'm not kidding... basically i'm just a trained rubbish eater....

oh well ... enuff of my nonsense... gonna head back to my notes... i cant even finish one chapter for 2 days... Can somebody pls tell me how efficient am I ! gosh!

So fast it's Tuesday lioaz!!! ahh.... jiu ming ah..... my exam dates are drawing nearer and nearer as time passes by...... *biting nails lioaz =p

Spend my day with my TP swim team ppl, had some fun with them and will be joining them again tml for the morning jogs and some team bonding games after that. =)
Well my TP swimmers are a bunch of great loving ppl...... make me miss my good old days as being a poly student... omg... y do i have to sound sooooo old... =p

Well gonna go and study now... =)

Finally i got hold of a new handphone... and that one is under my wishlist! muahhhahahahah.....

Ok.... enough of my nonsense for the day... me shall go source for my notes..... I need to study!

Monday finally arrives, I'm suppose to start studying today, well currently i'm stuck in my office, doing some of my paperworks.... *yawns...

Early in the morning, come to realise that one of my frn just broke off... hiaz.... tt's sad ... understand all those emotional struggle one person has to go tru, those emotional heartache, emotional dilemma... hiaz... tell me abt it man... i was at that stage not too long ago......Well Time will heal and someone better will come along.... i'm the best testimonial for it! =) *big grinz*

Going to head down for a course at Toa Payoh later and once back home i will start my revision tonight! yeah tonight! Did i just say tonight! ok... i will try..... =p

Just know that i have to fill up my stomach now..... i'm hungry....

*Food... food... where r u ..........................

IT's Family day again!!! heh~ Well was out doing some market shopping with my parents..... They buy sooo many stuffs... maciam like no need money like tt.... wah pianz.... hahahahah

My sis keep bugging me to bring her watch Shark Tale.... well we suppose to catch it on Sat, er.... ok, nvm ... nonetheless will bring her this coming week....... since i promise her i will stand by my promise... =)

Well basically another lazy Sunday... oh well... i just love it this way...... I hope i can stop time....... i cant Nua enough man!!! Tom is monday liaoz... and i reallie gonna study if not reallie no time...... argh!

* I need power.. i need magic power..... i wanna freeze time!
* Casting a spell "minimoniminimo.... Freeze the time!!!! ..................my spell no effect, time still ticking away.... -_-"

Had a late night chat with Jo, didnt know she can reallie talk, or should i say both of us can reallie talk.... if not for me to say it kinda late i think we could have talk throughout the night... yes .. i mean reallie throughout the night......

When was the last time i chatted so long with a gal or a person??....hmmmm.... very very long ago man! At least got 4years! i'm aint kidding... it's reallie very long... i didnt know that i'm capable to talk for soooo long on the phone again..... Well guess both of us reallie can communicate and talk rubbish man! wahahahah...Didnt know she such a sweet lady until ytd.... oh well.... cant stand it that she keep saying herself Holy and innocent... omg! I wanna puke... can someone pls give me a plastic bag.

Nothing much happen today, suppose to catch Shark Tale with princess but she never confirm so guess she busy or wadsoever... nonetheless hope she has an enjoyable day.

Head down to the pool for coaching in the afternoon, the sun was horrendous! However the pool water is aint tt hot/warm....After an hr or so... no more sun and it was so windy... and ohh... the water start to get freezing cold.... wooooo..... cold cold...

Finish coaching, went back to have my dinner and then head down to my cousin chalet..... nothing much there... feel kinda bored... ate some food... and i cant wait to go home! hahahaha... i'm a homely man just in case some of u dont know.... =p

Well tom is sunday!! wooohoo.... and i havent touch my notes yet... bleahz =p super guilty!! okok... i will start this coming monday! i promise!!!

* Notes Notes where r u .........

Dark clouds forming and i'm heading down to TP for coaching later..... Well hope it's not going to rain........ Weather has been like tt for the past 2 weeks or so.... make me sooo tempted to take a nap since the weather is so cool and nice =)

Will be popping champagne later at TP, it was a promise i made to my TP swim team swimmers last week that if tt ChrisyPoo is gonna be out of Sg idol for tt week, i will have a champagne celebration! Didnt know my champagne magic reallie works!!!! lolx..... well since he is out, i shall fulfill my promise. =)

Shall I pick up my notes and read!?!?! *scratch head! =p

I'm Back ~ Back after MIA from my blog for 3 days......... Well alot of stuffs happen but i'm just lazy or just simply no mood to pen down my thoughts, prolly too many things occupying my mind now. Guess what ! I havent even start my revision yet, can somebody just scream at me pls!!! Gosh!

Was at Tampiness CC playing badminton, i couldnt remember when was the last time i actually played badminton. Playing badminton of cos need badminton racket.... so i went to take out my badminton racket, and guess what, my badminton rackets was covered with dust!!! lolx... this shows how long i never touch my badminton racket lioaz.

Started playing at 7 plus, first hour of the game, my badminton skill was super duber rusty!!! hahahaha..... Finally able to pick up the pace and play to my ability during the later part of the game. We finish playing at 10pm, well 3hours of badminton! Solid! Wooooo.. so long never excercise and it feels so good to perspire! lolx... To my surprise, wasnt feeling too tired, in fact i think i could go on and play somemore..... 12midnight i dont think i have any problems abt tt! =)

This morning wake up early and head down to Katong Swimming Complex to teach those kids from Geylang Methodist Primary..... a huge group and a noisy one definately! I was screaming most of the time to control them and giving instruction to them...... I'm losing my voice now.... *cough........... i need some chinese herbs drink or *cooling* drink......

Well my day has been good so far.... and i still dont have any moods to bring myself to read all those scary notes of mine! Well i think i have to force myself...... anybody wanna scream at me!?!?! Please feel free yeah.......

Well aint sure whether i will blog often for this month because i reallie gonna have a very scary month! BOOKS ! BOOKS! and more BOOKS! Argh...... it's driving me insane.....

Wat a lovely sunday! I think i beginnig to love my sunday!!! hahahaha... I have been lazing ard and spending time with my parents for the past few weeks/months?. Woooohoooo.. i just love my sunday this way! keke`~

Was online the whole afternoon... web caming with my friends... hahah.. damm fun!enjoying soooo much!! It a gd way of de-stressing after working so hard during weekdays. =) Well took a nap before leaving for my nephew bday party. Was dreaming of princess, ahahhaha... yeah... she again right... ohh well.. i just cant get her out of my mind. Anyway was having some fun time with her in the dream and then suddendly i woke up .. i was like... chey! only dreaming... hiaz... if only we are what i'm dreaming... ahha... anyway she not even in town now lor........

Well... wonder how is she now... hope she is doing fine... and hope she knows how to take care of herself....... Take care yeah..... =)

Two more days before she is back...... oh well.... does it make any difference even though she is back....... hahaha... i hardly think so.... cause i believe she dont miss me the way i miss her.... oh well... nonetheless still hope she's enjoying herself and taking care of herself as well.

Tomolo is monday! Gonna work again... prob just for this week and that's it... not going to work till december cause as i have said November is my exam month!!! Argh!!! It is here lioaz!!! I'm going mad pretty soon.

*Can someone pls help me??? Dont give me luck, just give me the qns and the ans for the exam yeah!?!?!?

Happy Halloween Day!!!

Happy Halloween Day to everyone out there!!! ENJOY !!!

*Princess enjoy yrself over at HK yea.... Take care.... =)

New Blog Skin!!!

Woooooohoooo........ Created a new skin for my blog!!! Don't you think it look nice???? This is the first time i created something like this... dont u think i'm a genius!!! hahahahahahahahah... okok.... I'm just excited that's all .... anyway enjoy ya =p

Princess left late last night...... wishing her a safe journey and an enjoyable trip. =)

Well i have been blogging so frequently recently that i wonder have i got a habit out of it! However for the first time in many weeks, i dont feel like blogging ytd. Sorry ... prob i'm just feeling abit down.... PMS !?!? No, i dont think so.... prob i'm just sad that princess is not in singapore now.... Basically, i just have no mood.... Just realise that princess has the capability to make or break my day! Oh no.... this is terrible.... I know it doesnt make sense because we are not even together yet, and i dont think we have much chance of being together based on the current situation. Nonetheless i hope god can give me a sign.... is she the one??? I dont know man! I just know that she has somehow or rather become quite important for the way i behave.... she has the ability to make or break my day. She has the ability to make me feel happy or sad. Whatever the case.... i hope i wont sink down further until she give me a positive sign to do so.....

Still wanna wish her a safe journey! Take care princess, dont catch cold yeah..... =)

It gonna be another long long day to pass...........................

Ladder 49

Watch Ladder 49 just now, what a emotional show. It is a movie that play with individual emotion. Having watch HK firefighter show too, the story line is aint much different from it. Fire can be a good servant as well as a bad master. How true is this statement. Watching the show just bring back memories of my very own fire fighting experience. I believe any son, daughter and wife would be proud of my dad for his calmness and protectiveness over me and my mom then. The fire was big, it broke off at my house kitchen, my dad’s left arm is covered by flames. How would a normal person behaves when part of their body being covered by fire and their son and wife is with him too. Confuse, scared, Panic? Screaming for help? Not my dad! His is one brave man! No panic, just the claming look and soothing voice “Get out of the house, ask neighbours for help and call fire-station for rescue” Nodding my head and off I go…. Running out of my house leaving my dad alone fighting the fire. Images of fire on his left arm still running through my head. Wasn’t sure what to do but was just following my dad instruction. So I was out of the house and asking neighbours to help us out. My mom was worried sick. Soon people were seen rushing in and out of my house with pails and pails of water. Not long after, sirens of fire engine can be heard. There came those fireman trying to rescue the whole situation. My dad was brought to the hospital, he came back the very night. After the whole incident, patches of black color can be seen all over the house. It is aint black paints but black soot resulting from those fearsome flames! Till today my dad still has that burnt scar on his left arm, neither him nor me can forget that incident. For him, it leaves a deeper impression, for there are still scar to remind him of his close encounter and firefighting with the fire. Whereas for me, I will never forget, for I saw what actually happen, the terrifying moment, the braveness I saw in my dad. The fearful scene of that very instant of my dad’s left arm being covered by fire, could not forget how dangerous the whole situation was. It was really a close encounter with that bad master side of fire.

Back in my navy days, I got a chance to learn how to fight fire. Wearing those suits and carry those oxygen tanks, playing with fire extinguisher, putting out fire with fire extinguisher and water hose. It was a terrific experience. Did manage to learn how to control the fire with all sorts of techniques. From all my experience I had, I can definitely duly feel what Ladder 49 this show is trying to bring out.

A good show overall, it shows how brave all those firefighter are. The dilemma of each fireman feels when they have a family to take care of, the concerns of each family members about their own hero in the house. The feeling of a lost collegues... tt kind of feeling can reallie kills! The feeling of losing a close kin! That is sooo much worse! For all those firefighter that has risk their life to saves soooo many lives and prevent many broken family. They duly deserve my utmost respect! *Salutes!

The wind is cold, its another cold and wet day, hope princess is able to take care of herself. Well wake up this morning feeling abit moody, dont know the exact reason.... i'm serious ... until now i cant find the exact reason for feelng moody.... Hiaz... all i know is that i'm sooo sad when i heard tt princess is going away for 4 days. Yes, though i dont meet her everyday or talk to her over the phone everyday, at least i get to see her online or u know at least i know tt she is in spore, if let say i wanna contact her, i'm abe to do so tt kind.... Well, sorry guys... i think i think too much liaoz...I think i hardly stand a chance with her anyway.... ok... wadever...

Wadever the case... i wish her safe journey and hope she able to take care of herself..... if she can give me a chance... i will be more than willing to take care of her... but she's an independent woman, so she knows how to take good care of herself.

It's gonna be a long long day for me...... a long cold day.....

Just Bath.... wooo ... feeling so fresh and clean. =) Was in a happy mood until my desktop cant boot up!! I'm so pissed now! ARGH!!! My desktop up the lorry lioaz!! Bloody hell... spoil at this time.... and i got soo many important stuff inside my desktop comp somemore!!! argh!!! Luckily i got my laptop if not you guys wont see me online and of cos dont talk about writing this in my journals!

Was home for dinner... and guess what i saw on TV!? I saw princess again... omg! This time is not a glimpse lor... got soo much of her..... I just smile to myself =) Finally hear her voice over the TV. It's been a long time since i last see her and of cos dont mention abt talking to her over the phone. Hmm.... me kinda in a lost what i'm going to do.... Well if its meant to be, its meant to be yeah.... =)
Anyway was happy to see her... though it's on tv and not face to face.... at least i get to see her.... well she just look so sweet and cute on tv yeah.... =) Anyway she has been on my mind ever since i wake up.... well dunno whether she feels what i feels too or not.....

Anyway bought a pair of shoe .... yes i spend money again!!!! Luckily got discount.. $100 for a Hush Puppies Working Shoe. Ex right? But i just like Hush pupp... one of my fav brand.... just for yr information, i wore Hush Pupp school shoe during my upper sec sch days! Hahahah

I think i better get my comp fix!! argh! I feel like slapping my desktop comp and ask it to wake up its bloody idea!!! argh!
BOOM!! * Slap the comp!!

I shall censored the rest of the details........ =p

Before i leave,anyone wanna give me money? I think i need money to get a new desktop ! Haiz.... gonna spend money again...... going to get POK KAI soon liao lah......

Just sooo happen to caught a glimpse of princess on tv again!!! Hahah... seems like it is so qiao..... didnt watch the show onli until tt fateful part of hers..... didnt know she will appear on tonight show... ahhaha.... reallie very qiao man! Seems like god want her to be in my mind always yeah..... hahah.. okie okie... i'm uttering rubbish again...... dont wanna her to feel awkward or watsoever.... Very happy that we are still friends. =) Can we develop further??? Hahah ... only time will tell and also only if fate allows us to do so... meanwhile still wanna know her better. =)

" "
U U

Wake up this morning, feeling so much better than ytd, however still feel sick though.... the weather ah is terrible man...was sick because of that.... Anyway was in great mood to go to office... feel so relax!

Today went shopping alone! Hate to do shoppin alone, how i wish i have somebody accompanying me...... nonetheless i brought a Giordano jeans, It's the latest design and it cost me $70 bucks! okok.. $69 to be exact. Wanting to buy a pair of jeans soooo much... finally got one! Was feeling happy... =) Always nice feeling to buy things but painful to realise i've just spend money.... ohh.... heart pain yeah.... Walk in and out of several shops... wanting to buy soooo many stuffs... i guess i have to curb my temptation of buying things, cause right now i'm in a period of agressive savings!!! I need to save enough to pay off all my loans... i want to feel debt free!!!! Once i get myself debt free.... i will SPEND!!!! Spend on the things i wanna buy soooo much! Saw some nice shirts and pants at TOPSHOP and G2000, soooo tempted to buy all those stuffs and then procced to sony ericsson shop, saw the latest phone s700i!!! Wah pianz again feel so tempted to buy it! The phone look so nice and cool and the function is gd! solid man!!!!

CAN SOMEBODY PLS GIVE ME MONEY!!!!

I wanted to buy sooo much things... i think if i got money now.... my one time shopping spree will satisfy all my urge.... and it will probably cost me $3k to $5k !!! Hahaha.... $5k for one day of shopping is hell lots of money man!! urm... at least to me lah... I got sooooo many things i wanan buy!!!! Gosh!!! Can somebody really pls give me money to spend!!!

*Can anyone tell me this coming week the first prize no. for 4D... or can i have the winning tickets for next month Singapore Sweeps!?!??!!?!?!?

* I need money!!!!

Woke up this morning with a bad sore throat. My throats hurts like mad.... think it lack of natural lubricants, which is WATER! Drank lots of water and eat vitamin C pills, at least doesnt hurt that much and can go to work. It has been rainning for the past few days.... ohh.. nice cold weather though...... well work up in a sunny morning then after that the sky start to turn dark and ka boom ! It rains..... First thing came to my mind was princess.... Hahahah... yea i know i'm mad... Cause it's reallie rainning heavily and its very cold... and i know during this period of time she would leave house to go to somewhere... so i was worried that she might catch cold... okie okie... i know she will take care of herself.... well.. i'm just worried for her lah..... silly me ah... =p

Well ... manage to hit my ERP award! hahahah... Phew! wat a close shave! Well well.... Hopefully everything will turn out well!!!! =) So far it has been a great monday! no blues!!! hahahahah....

Still feeling sick.... i guess i havent been resting well for the past few days... Hopefully i feel better next few days! Gotto start on my revision soon....... November very scary month for me!!! aaaahhhhh......

Manchester United 2 Arsenal 0

Saw that score!?!?!?!?!?! YEA!!!!! Man u Rocks man!!!! Man U, my fav team has beaten Arsenal, my most hated team, 2-nil!!! Most importantly it ended arsenal 49 unbeaten runs. SSSSSOOOOOOOO Happy!!! Tomorrow sure got mood to work!!! HAhahhahah....

Just got back home, was out with my parents..... Well Sunday is always a day i would dedicate to my parents ! I just wanna spend time with them. To me ..... Sunday is Family day !!!!

Below is the lyrics of the song "Angels Brought Me here" I found this song very meaningful..... ok at least to me lah........ cause this song speaks alot for my current situation.... I thought my dreams came true, i thought she is the answer to my prayers, anyway she really did saves me.............. okok.... i'm unttering rubbish again....... wadever..... Enjoy the lyrics yea, will post the song soon.

Angels Brought Me Here - Guy Sebastian

It's been a long and winding journey
But I'm finally here tonight
Picking up the pieces
Walking back into the light
To the sunset of your glory
Where my heart and future lies
There's nothing like that feeling
When I look into your eyes

My dreams came true
When I found you
I found you
My miracle

If you could see what I see
You're the answer to my prayers
And if you can feel
The tenderness I feel
You would know
It would be clear
That angels brought me here

Standing here before you
Feels like I've been born again
Every breath is your love
Every heartbeat speaks your name

My dreams came true
Right here in front of you
My miracle

If you could see what I see
You're the answer to my prayers
If you could feel
The tenderness I feel
You would know
It would be clear
That angels brought me here

Brought me here to be with you
I'll be forever grateful
(Oh forever grateful)

My dreams came true
When I found you
My miracle

If you could see what I see
You're the answer to my prayers
And if you could feel
The tenderness I feel
You would know
It would be clear
That angels brought me here


* I missing princess again.... I don't know why, i know i shouldn't feel this way because urm...... urm..... well wadever lah..... i just know that whenever i think of her.... the thought of her would make me smile =)

It's a cold and wet sunday.... wooo..... cold cold..... Don't know why it rain so much recently.... is it because it is feeling sad and crying for me?? hahahahaha... me talking rubbish....

Well .... real cold..... hope princess can take good care of herself and dont catch cold =)

*yawns*.... Doing nothing online now... very sianz... however dont feel like sleeping early.... just wanna rest and relak.... =) sianz sianz sianz...... today is a cold and wet day.... was freezing cold when i was teaching! Seriously, it's no joke to teach on cold days.... the pool is just like a suffering chamber!!! Freezing cold.......


"Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened." =)

Well this sentence definately suits what i'm feeling right now..... =)

*nites everyone

Wake up not too long ago, and here i am writing things in my blog page.... i think it is going to be like a routine for me liaoz.... no good man... i need to catch more rest !!! Feeling a bit sick.... caught a flu .... hiaz..... =(

Well, i'm feeling abit awkward today, cant say the exact reason why i'm feeling this way, hmm.... prob bcos of princess bah. You know sometimes having too many girls chasing you is no good.... cause when there is a time where u needed to chase someone, you will be in a lost, and this is what i'm feeling right now.... Boring man!

Ok, so what if i miss her, she dont miss me, so what if i like her, she dont like me...... hahaha... Anyway still want to thank her, for after so long nobody except her, she is the only gal that can make me keep my ex out of my mind! She is special or wat! To me she is really one special person.......

She is damm funnie... she didnt even know how to reject a person.... aint sure whether did i make the right step or not.... at least i know i've no regret!? *william hung --> I've already give my best and i've no regrets!
hahahahahahhaah =p

Well.... she never reallie reject me, however she give me a very big qns mark ans.... i dont know whether she trying to say "look you are a nice guy, however you are not my type, so i dont think u suit me and bcos you are a nice guy, i dont know how to reject you in a nice way" answer or "ok, i'm shock, i dont know what to do, i'm not rejecting you because i dont mind knowing u even better first, to see where we can go" answer. Well whatever the answer may be, i will know it during these few days.... i've just have to put myself in her shoe and get the answer, though it is tough, i mean very very tough!

I guess most likely i've have to move on again bah.... it's not being negative, it is being prepared for the worst! Well it would be good if she can show me signs, then i will know wat to do.....

ok, this is morning madness! ciaoz, adios.................

*Hungry again!

Finally tell her how i feel...... a stone just lift up from my heart.... i can breath again...... Well i guess she might be reading this post too... anyway it doesnt matter actually... this is an open blogsite wat... anybody can read abt it. =p

Well luckily we still friends though.... anyway i feel so light after telling her.... and the best thing is we are still friends.... well i kinda expected she wouldnt know wat to react! true enough she dont know how to reply, ahahhaha, she dont know how to reject me!.... am i being negative or what!?!? ayiah if not then say what, say i still got hope meh.... bcos she never reject me???? haha... tt's urm abit wishful thinking man.....I know myself.... prob i'm not her type... well it's ok yea.... nobody is suited for everyone =)

Thanks edison for yr concern yea....... ; )

Happy playing gunbound princess =) Gotto grab something first before i sleep... i'm very very hungry!!! Recently i get hungry so easily! am i have puberty or wat!!! gosh!!

* I need food!!!

Just got back home after a long long day! Slept at 2am and wake up at 7am today! I'm dead tired now!!! *Yawns*

Just came back home after the lifesaving meeting, finally got hold of the CD from melvin! yesh! finally can view our Japan competition that was telecast on Star Sports channel that was shown two months back!

Wat an exciting yr ahead for lifesaving!! Plenty of oversea competition!!! wooohooo! steady! i feel like trainning again!!! hahahahahah =)

Came back and show dad my japan trip! then all of a sudden... just took a glimpse of what showing on the tv and i manage to saw princess!!! omg! how qiao is that! She looks real good.... ok prob i'm just bias! Wadever... she reallie look good wat. =p

Ohh weekend is coming!!!! SHIOK! =)

Shall i say or shall i not.... okok... i know i have been saying so many times... well.. i'm reallie in a dillema what! hiaz....... well hope watever decision i'm going to make wont make me regret later on. =/

Just bath.... Feeling so clean and nice! Just got back from wx's grandma wake..... Have a nice time chatting with princess , wx and wx's cousin, gavin.

Anyway It's been 5 days since we last meet, however it's seems to me we havent been seeing each other for ages. Tell me abt missing somebody man, i was reallie looking forward to seeing her today... though our meeting is abit the u know.....yes.. out of the place.

Princess show me her kids photo...she look so cute in the photo.... however i never tell her that.... ayiah me ah.. this person always dont know how to express myself.... sometimes i reallie dont know wat to say abt myself... haiz...

Anyway today was the first time i hear her talk so much and smile so much..... she just plain sweet yea..... I just love her big round eyes... it is so mesmerizing....
While looking deep in her eyes, i feel like telling her that i got a crush on her.... i mean...i reallie fighting hard to keep this little secret of mine to myself! We were chatting and laughing away.. and i'm just plain worried that if let say i tell her oredi... it will affect our friendship, the way we behaving now...... i'm reallie in a dillema!

Well i was reallie enjoying every seconds with her around. Well she's online now... however she went to bath... hmm...... i'm still thinking of her at this moment

Should i say or should i not?!?!? Shall i toss a coin to decide!?!?!? omg! this is madness......

What can i say........ hiaz...... can somebody show me a sign....... ohh dear.....

Anyway Good night, sugary dreams my dear princess............. =)

I've just wake up not too long ago.... getting excited abt what going to lay ahead for the day. =)

Have a chat with princess ytd night before she sleep.... still get so excited whenever i saw her online..... have some fun chatting with her...and was enjoying every bit until she mention her crush... i was like ... *ouch! pain! "xin ru dao ge"......It bring me back down to earth, well.... that's life isnt it...... she aint know how sour i got, or how heart pain i have, nonetheless i thank her for telling me the things she going tru... at least i'm someone she trust and she's comfortable in telling....

Really struggling with myself on whether do i wanna tell her abt how i feel or not.... i dont know how long can i keep this feeling to myself..... however at the same time i dont wanna spoil the current friendship that we are having now..... i'm just worried that everything wont turn out fine... then both of us will be in an awkward position.... I dont wanna her to feel awkward. Anyway even if i tell her i got a crush abt her... i guess tt's abt it bah..... i still wanna know her better... bcos i think i have yet to know her well enough...... I just hope that if i choose to tell her one day, she just aware that there is someone out there is carrying a torch for her.....aiyah... dont wanna think so much lah.... i just wanna know her more first.

Well, going to wx grandma wake later in the evening...... dont know whether shld i go or not... however since princess is going... then i also go lor.... i dont wanna go to the wake with nobody i know oso..... feels very weird lor. Well she say she going right after her mc coaching.... so that means i think her bro shld be coming also bah.. and some of her friends too...... but wadever the case... it suppose to pay the last respect to wx grandma though i never see her before. it's just out of respect bah.... anyway just that at the same time, i oso can see princess ... =)

Well looking forward to meeting her later on.... it's been a long long time since i feel for someone till like this... it's surprises even me at the rate i'm falling into this...... hmm.. guess she reallie one special gal to make me feel this way bah....

*thinking, thinking, still thinking abt her..... omg! this is madness....can somebody tell me what to do......

I'm back home!!! Yea after a long long tiring day!?!?! I'm walking like a dead zombie just now....... Sleep late last night... as i was experiencing/experiementing with my 'rented' laptop ! Thanks yixun... thanks for lending =) Xie Xie Ni. Borrow the laptop to do my thesis for my degree course. My desktop abit unstable, i'm just worried that it gonna crash anytime!

Went to K-box ytd with the swim team ppl, had a great singing session... from my heart will go on by celine dion to without me by eminent! We basically sing all kinds of songs! Had a great time tag team with andrew.... we sang well for the song "jie kou" by jay chou.. anybody outta wanna hear me sing!??! hahahah... just kidding..... me singing so-so only... However was having a real great time singing ..... =)

Wake up early in the morning... and guess what's the first thing i do after i wake up?????? I went to check my phone.... was hoping that i will recieve sms from princess..... hahah.. abit dumb right... but well.. i dont know why i behave like this... hiayoh.. this is madness.

On my way to office... i was doing work in the bus, this is the usefulness of having a laptop with you! So convenient to work!! you can work anytime any place.... I can just use the spare time to do my project instead of siting like a blur guy staring at the tv programm shown on the tv mobile. I'm just trying to make my time more effective tt's all.

Still thinking of her whenever i go...hiaz.... i think she must be feeling tired... bcos she has been running tru my mind the whole day!!!!

Well still thinking of whether shld i tell her how i feel abt her.. or shld i just keep it low profile and keep it to myself..... I'm having mixed feeling... bcos i know that prob i have a low chance as she oredi have a crush on someone else.... however... i dont know... i just think that she's reallie a nice gal.. i tout we have quite a fair bit of smiliarity between us...... hmm..... i'm in a dilemma......

Anyway was dead tired after a long day at work..... going for a course over at Toa Payoh... i was dragging my feet to the place...... then all of a sudden.. my handphone sms ringing tone ring..... i was like hiaz...er.. ok..... the whole day my phone has been ringing... and everytime i was hoping that i will receive sms from her.... and everytime was like er... it's not her lor... so when my hp ring.. i was telling myself... ayiah ... confrim not her.... and guess what .. when i saw the sms.. i was like er....huh??..... did i see correctly??? It was her!!! i was thinking to myself..... sure or not... reallie its her??? After seeing several times, and reassuring myself that it is her... i was like.... *smiles* she reallie know when to make my day !!! =) =) =) =)

*right now still thinking abt her..........

Can somebody outta save me??

WOW!!!! Feeling good this morning!! I chatted with princess ytd night. Well though the topic is abit out there, but who cares at least i get to talk to her and understand her a little better. Well can conclude that i got a crush on her and she got a crush on somebody else! wah pianz eh.... i wanna faints lioaz..... anyway dont know whether does she has abit of feeling for me... well .... i dont think so lah.... nonetheless i'm just plain happy to talk to her over the phone. It doesnt matter what the conversation is, it is the person on the other line that matters.

" It doesnt matter what the conversation, just as long as she calls " Invisible Man by 98 degree.

Well still thinking whether do i wanna tell her that i got a crush on her..... i mean if i dont tell her, she wouldnt know my feeling for her and then i will become like the person in the song "Invisble man"

anyway when she told me she was feeling sad, dissapointed and confused.... i more or less guess it concern BGR, and true enough, she feeling sad, dissapointed and confused because of what's going on between her and her crush.
Haiz.... when i realise that she got a crush... i was feeling abit sad...... i was like... er.... okie.. she got a crush..... anyway it's the first time i see her like this... yes, though i dont know her long enough but this is the first time i see her not behaving her usual self.

I was feeling sad that she's sad. I mean this is the last thing i wanna her to be. and guess what.... i actually kinda help her between herself and her crush. er... wait.. i dont think i reallie help lah.... i was just listening to her.... just give a listening ear....and a few suggestion... anyway i just wanna her to pour out what is bothering her so she would not bottle up her feeling and feel sad deep down inside, i just want her to feel better and be happy.
Well for me.... liking someone doesnt mean that u must have her by yr side, it is making tt someone happy. I'm just trying to do that.
Told andrew abt it... and he say i dont know my priorities... ahhahahah... i mean yes i got a crush on her but tt doesnt mean i must make her mine what.... if she like somebody and she's better of with that somebody ... then it is good for her wat... as i say liking someone doesnt mean that you must have tt someone by yr side, it is letting that someone you like feels happy.

Well i aint sure whether this is a one-off conversation over the phone.... i still wanna chat with her over the phone again and get to know and understand her more.... and i dont wanna keep chating with her over the same issues too.. cause it makes no sense either... anyway during our conversation, we also do talk abt other stuffs... and to my findings... somehow or rather both of us behaves the same way in life, and have the same thoughts in life and in love.

Didnt know she also has a bad experience when she was competing in last year sea games....... Totally understand how she was feeling tt time cos i was badly hurt, badly affected when i was competing in last year sea games too.....

She also agrees that in relationship that there is three stages... that is .... crush, like and then love. She will never hurried into a relationship because to her it makes no sense.. bcos she prefer to reallie understand a person first before she will have a relationship with tt person.... and for me its the same! both of us just got the same thinking.

There are still plenty of things that i found out that she got the same thinking as i do in terms of life, sports, relationship. How coincident can that be...... Prob sports person do understand another sports person better... but i find that we just have too many things in common... aint sure if she's feeling this way.... but i reallie do think that we have lots in common.

Ohh... this is getting a little long out here..... still thinking should i let her know that i got a crush on her........Below is a short list of the things i like about her..... and i believe there will be more next time... =)

10 Things I Like abt HER
* I like her big round eyes
* I like her long silky hair.... makes me wanna touch and smell her hair
* I like the way she smiles...... it's the best things that can ever happen on earth!
* I like the way she 'bian zhui'
* I like the way she nodes her head innocently ... she just look so sweet and cute.
* I like the way she looks when she's blur.... tt's so cute!
* I like her simplicity
* I like the way she always think for others, she would keep her problems to herself bcos she dont wanna make ppl worried for her. She just want ppl ard her to be happy. For this she is sooo like me, bcos i behave this way too.
* I like the way she thinks, though she is young, she is matured enough and she somehow or rather knows what she wants in life.
* I like the way she handle over relationship matters because it is soooo smiliar to how i handle mine.


I've been wondering whether are we meant to be together because we have so many things in common, and able to understand each other point of view, nonetheless it is still too early too fast, i would love to know her a little more, a little better first. =)



Falling - Ant and Dec
You make me weak, girl you stand out from the crowd,
You are so strong never let life get you down
I can't go on, pretending I don't see
Just how good I'd be for you
And how good you'd be for me
And it doesn't matter how hard I try,
I can't suppress this feeling, this feeling inside
I think I'm falling girl

I'm falling for you, I'm falling for you,
It doesn't matter what you say, doesn't matter what you do
Baby it's true, I'm falling for you, I'm falling for you
You know how much I care for you,
(There's nothing that I would, I would not do)

Just got home ...... feeling tired..... well what's new yeah.... been out the whole day, confrim tired what. Well had a quick chat with amlin about some of my stuffs, and surprisingly after the chat, i realise tt i dont miss princess so much liaoz... though still think of her... but aint missing her like how i did for the pass few days... guess more or less i know or amlin and i concluded tt princess aint tt interested in me afterall.... well tt's my so-called thoughts and my conclusion. Haiz... take it slow man... shant think so much.... let nature takes its course.

Just realise the month november will be a scary month for me! super busy!!! dont think i can work man!!! Exam and exam and still exam during November!!! I think i will be a dead meat during tt month!! The thoughts of it coming soon just scared the shit out of me!!!

Aint missing her but thinking of her right now........ =/

Gd morning everyone! It's monday morning! Monday blues???? Well... didnt reallie sleep well last night, wasn't sure the exact reason, prob i just keep thinking of her! damm! Woke up and came online straight just so that i can spot her online.... She wasnt online... Then all of a sudden her nick just appear! i get so excited abt it.... I think i reallie fallen for her lioaz..... damm! not so quick pls....

She doesnt sound too happy ytd and this morning... her behaviour is sooooo different... probably i'm just too sensitive... but i can feel it man... I've got this feeling, she's not interested in me man! Probably she's giving out signals to tell me??? or was she having PMS?

Wadever, i guess i done for it man! cant believe i'm missing her every moment! argh! i hate myself for that! If she has the same feeling for me as i have for her... things would be much simplier..... well i guess it's not the case.

Does she knows i'm fond of her? prob i think.... she has been showing mixed signs.... wassup man.....

One thing i found out.. she is quite different from the rest of the girls i know, prob tt make her unique and probably certain words i said kinda offended her....... omg! i aint wanna offended her anymore.... dont know whether we can ever go out again or not...... I have yet to know her more..... dont know whether i have the chance or not? She's one busy gal and i think her time table just clashes with mine!? unless both of us reallie make an effort to go out together, like our first date?!? i mean our first outing..... It's kinda hard to know what's reallie in her mind......

I wanna go out with her again..... i think she driving me alittle crazy..... not much hope on our current situation.... but i've just wanna know her better as a friend.....

Got this feeling of spending time with her every moments.......... even not talking also nvm... i just wanna feel her presense......reallie i'm done for it man.... not even in a relationship and i'm feeling this way..... gone case liaoz............
Can someone tell me i still can be saved!?!?? gosh!

*missing her now* =/

Went to watch White Chick just now.... yeah..... i know i'm slow, it's was shown like dont know when ago but i just only manage to catch it today. Well.... went to watch it with princess as promise though.... Haha.... feel abit weird and funnie to watch it together.... i think somehow or rather both of us feel alittle awkard... couldnt explain the exact feeling.... well ... one thing i know for sure.... i know her alittle better after today... Nice cheerful girl she is.... hmm.... well well... aint know wat she's thinking man.... wadever..
Sometimes is not the movie.. is the person you watch it with..... well... The whole show is funnie... and the show is nice not bcos it is funnie or entertaining, it is also because that i watch it with her... keke~
Well aint sure is she the one..... but i cant deny the fact that i'm thinking of her now..... eh oh.... i'm in for trouble lioaz......
She aint the prettiest gal i know... but i do feel comfortable going out with her though it is onli like the first time we are out?! however still feel abit awkard... er.. of cos bcos it the first time we are out together u know..... hmmm....

I dont think she had the same feeling for me as i felt for her... well prob still early ah or prob tt's my thinking.... haiz... wadever.... one thing i know... i still have to know her better... and this means i would be out with her more often...ahhahah... didnt reallie talk to her today cos i was kinda tongue-tied...... i'm always like that ... i dont know why.... i hate myself for not being able to talk as and when i like.... sometimes i always get tongue-tied at important occasion!!! DAMM!

anybody outta know how to cure tongue-tied........ gosh!

I missing her ...... it's been a while since i last felt this way........ well suppose to watch movie with her though... but i think aint gonna watch it lioaz for wadever reason i aint sure of......

Could she be the one?!?! Aint sure?! but i know that i had my eyes laid on her..............

Who is she?!?! for those quite close to me will know who is she.... if u dont know, then.... ahhahahaha... u aint tt close to me ah.......

She had those mesmerizing round eyes and long silky hair.......... she aint lack of suitor i guess..... wadever.... if it's meant to be, it will be ah.... so aint in a hurry of this though......

Will she be mine?? hahahah..... BIG BIG BIG qns mark man

i aint sure wat to do next........ well... why shld i worry when i oredi say let nature take its course yeah...... =)

For now...... i'm still waiting.................................for the right person to come along.