Its been a real long time since i update

Taking a look at when was my last entry, it was 25th oct 2005, that means i havent been blogging close to 2 months! terrible!


Alot of things happen, was busy as usual, went to HK in nov, the trip was pretty ok, didnt reallie have any memorable things to cap it all. Nonetheless will revisit HK again. Well the things i bought in Shen Zhen, cant work properly! argh! My 2GB memory card is spoilt! my 4GB flash drive seems to have problem, worse is that i bought another 2 more of the 4GB flash drive. It's so sickening to know that its not in working condition anymore, i dont think i will ever buy any electronic product there. I was still contempleting whether to get an mp3 player when i was over there, luckily i didnt, if not i would have loss even more!


In the month of Dec, i can say that its a month of celebration, i'm not just refering to christmas day, i'm talking bout the no. of things me and my dear gonna celebrate. Yup =)
Oh well still have to thank her for all her understanding, tolerence, love all these period.


I'm gonna have a competition in Feb 06 next year. I dont have a problem with that, but the competition period clashes with 14 feb, valentine day! Now thats a real big problem. Not that i reallie do care abit about it, i mean com'om everyday can be a valentine day, 14 feb its reallie just another advertising gimmick! Companies earn big bucks during that day. I mean i treasure my dearie each and everyday. I appreciate her alot for the things she had done and i do celebrate our anniversaries. I mean on days such as anniversaries, it is reallie special because it reallie just involve the both partner and its a special day because you know how much it meant for both of u. Oh well, as much as we know of this 14 feb gimmick, we as human still falls for it due to influence, blah blah blah, for wadever reason you can think of.


Though gals can say that aiyah 14 feb is just another advertising gimmick, but we all knows gals, their heart just doesnt goes along with their mouth. They doesnt reallie mean what they say sometimes and so yes, guys still need to buy chocolates, flowers, dinners on 14 feb. and yes, i'm now caught in a dilemma.


I told myself that year 2006 would probably be the last year that i'm gonna compete, firstly because my work is piling up and i dont think i can have the time to train for competition in the future. Secondly i would reallie wanna move forward with my career in the future, wait till things are more stablise, then maybe i will start thinking abt sports again, com'om i'm a guy, i need to get my career path settle as soon as possible. Thirdly i'm not young anymore, i need more time to train to condition my body and i cant also afford to keep taking time off and distract my career advancement. So basically i think 06 would probably be the last year i gonna compete before i give myself a break before maybe competiting in the future. Year 2006 would also be lifesaving world rescue (which is equivalent to olympics level) in feb and Commenwealth lifesaving games (which is equivalent to commenwealth games level) in aug/sep. These are the two level i have yet to compete before, and i'm looking to compete in the highest level first before i can put a mini full stop in my sports life before i can concentrate on my career. It would be a wonderful end to my sporting life if i choose not to compete again in future because i know i would have no regrets in the lifesaving sports as i have seen what i wanted to see, and compete what i wanted to compete in the highest level. Its an experience not many can have it. I do not wish to have any regrets just like in my previous sports, Swimming and fin-swimming.


i'm not single now, and i'm in a relationship and i know how much feb 14 does means to a gal and i also do know what is the competition that gonna take place in feb means to me as well, both means just as much to me. For the competition it is something of an olympic level, tell me how many can compete in the olympics and how many can experience from this. To some, it maybe a once in a lifetime thingy. I will be having a selection trial soon, to me, being selected would not be too tough, as i'm one of the better one in that sports, however right now i'm kinda caught in a dilemma. Not just because of 14 feb , but of cos the no. of days that me and dear gonna be apart. I know what she went tru everytime she send me off at the airport and the unbearable feeling of letting me go and the anticipating feeling of waiting for me to come back. All these make me think of whether i do reallie wanna go forward competiting and fulfilling my own personal lifesaving sporting career.


While i'm in a dilemma, someone that closest to my heart wish that i wont get selected for this coming feb trip. To me, i was like ouch! it hurts! it does reallie hurt. To hear that from someone else is already not a pleasant thing let alone it was from someone close to your heart.


I always hear this proverb, "Behind a successful man, there's always a noble woman" This sentence cant go very wrong. I can put everything down and accompany her all day all night, but it is possible? Who is to feed us, who is to earn money, who is to get the things we want in life. To not work hard, and earn loads of money, is it possible?


I know she is sad that i'm going off again, and leaving her behind to wait patiently for my return. I know how it feels to miss someone. I also know how it feels to not be able to celebrate feb 14 with someone you love. i know i know i knows it all. I dont feel good at all too. I miss her just as much whenever i'm away. However that sentence came out from someone i love, someone so close to my heart was something that make me very very sad. I feel like crying, i'm not a crying boy fyi, but i just feel real sad to hear what i heard. i'm speechless... i'm tired... its late, and i'm going to sleep.........